Martha or Mary?

When did you last read the account of Jesus with Martha and Mary (Luke 10:38-42)? When you did, where did your sympathies lie?

I can tell you that I usually end up feeling sorry for Martha. Why is that? Partly because I have been in Martha's position; lots to do and no one helping. I can feel my self getting annoyed for her as I read the account.

When you are in that situation - the one doing all the work - you usually feel self-righteous. You are the one doing all the work, with no help from anyone else. What a shock it must have been for Martha, then, when she approached Jesus and asked him to get Mary to help her, to be rebuked! Surely, as the one getting things done, she was in the right? I think many of us are left with the feeling, in spite of what we know, that Jesus is somehow being unfair. But I suspect that the sense of unfairness has much deeper roots in me and perhaps in you too, than mere experience of being the one doing all the work. So let me try and unpack the reasons....

I start with the knowledge that our world tells us that useful people are the ones rushing around doing things, building a career for themselves. We admire "self-made" people. We think that sitting around and listening is somehow self-indulgent. Add to this the fact that we want to be approved of by other people; we know that the world approves of those who seek their approval by doing what they are asked to do. Martha knew what was expected of her by others and she did it; bravo we say, and we too look at Mary and silently judge her.

Go deeper still, though. There is something about Mary's actions that actually irritates me. Is this because I know how much time I spend doing things for others at the expense of my relationship with Jesus? A nun at a retreat centre once told me that people often find silent retreats difficult because they fear an encounter with God. I do not know what was in Martha's mind but I know that it is so much easier for me to recite a prayer and then get up and get going, than pause and wait on the Lord. Am I afraid that He won't speak at all or that I will not hear what I want to hear? Why do I itch to rush around?

At the bottom of all of this, of course, is my relationship with Jesus. I long for depth of relationship yet I keep him at arm's length with all my activity. I read the story of Martha and Mary and the Holy Spirit convicts me with uncomfortable feelings and thoughts. Have I surrendered to my Lord? Am I letting Him be my guide? Am I living to please Him alone?

Lord Jesus Christ, my Master and my God, overcome my fear and rebellion. Give me the strength to sit and listen and learn before I rise and act. Amen.